The Chocolate Cookie (Learning to Love)
Everyone wants a chocolate cookie.
But 98 % of people had their mouths sewn shut.
A long time ago.
Still, they want to eat cookies — but they don’t even remember how.
So they pretend.
They talk about cookies, look at pictures in cookbooks and on TikTok, follow their favorite bakery on Instagram.
They compare brands, watch movies about cookies, read books, listen to songs.
They dream, they fantasize, they act like cookie experts.
Some even crumble a real one on their nose, just to feel something.
But they don’t eat.
They don’t taste.
It’s all theater.
A trick for themselves — and for everyone else.
And that becomes familiar. Even pleasant. The familiar pain and frustration. We get stuck in the role of victim because then we don’t have to take responsibility.
That’s just how we are.
That’s just how life is.
What are we supposed to change?
Talk about other flavors?
The Coping Deadlock.
Then we come along and offer a real chocolate cookie.
Not to talk about — to taste.
To experience.
Finally.
But first, you have to do something: you have to cut the thread.
We have everything ready — scissors, a mirror, time, and understanding.
It doesn’t take long.
Maybe ten, maybe thirty seconds.
That’s it.
But no one can do it for you.
It’s your job.
And why wouldn’t you do it — after longing for cookies your whole life?
Because of those thirty seconds.
That thread has limited you for as long as you can remember.
You’ve suffered so much, and spent endless energy trying to hide it.
Only thirty seconds to undo it — after all those years of pretending?
How stupid would that be?
You’re not stupid.
You just couldn’t see it.
You always believed you were broken.
That you were the only one with a mouth that didn’t work.
You thought you were the problem.
Everyone else seemed fine — and you were the mistake, the one who doesn’t belong, the one who can’t love.
That was your world.
And inside that world, you did everything right.
But what that picture didn’t show is that it wasn’t your fault.
It was a foreign stitch.
Your mouth was never wrong — it was just sealed.
And what you didn’t know: 98 % of people have the same thread.
They all pretend.
They all hide their weakness with everything they’ve got.
We’re all the same in that.
The 2 % who can actually eat never imagine that the others are only acting.
Why would they?
The irony is: we could meet so easily if we knew this secret about each other.
And removing the thread is easy — once you’re ready to do it.
But as long as we keep pretending, no one understands what’s really going on.
So how do we change it?
By really looking.
When we start to truly see, hear, understand, and touch one another — we begin to meet, for real.
When shame fades and self-judgment softens, self-deception loses its grip.
We remove the thread and take our first bite of a chocolate cookie.
Finally.
As long as our minds spin around hiding our flaws, we’re too distracted
to see anything at all.
Yes — you were made for chocolate cookies.
You were built for love and connection.
But that thread keeps you from it.
And even more than that thread holds you back the thought that you’re the only one who has it.
You think you’re broken.
But you were only limited, because someone put their limitation on you.
It wasn’t your choice.
And you can change back.
It takes less time than all the pretending you’ve done.
When the thread is gone — that brief moment of shame, courage, and relief — you’ll finally taste a real cookie.
And you’ll wonder why you spent 95 % of your energy pretending.
But you’ll wonder that with a chocolate cookie in your mouth.
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